Handout # 1 Handout # 1
The Secrets of
CHARACTER &
LEADERSHIP
In a leader, character is the solid foundation which supports all he does.
And anyone can know the leader’s character when he sees the leader’s behavior.
In other words, a leader really doesn’t have to be the smartest guy; he doesn’t have to be handsome or witty; and he doesn’t even have to be a great organizer.
Do you know why?
Because he can get thinkers, organizers and implementers to join his team; he can recruit, interview, select and hire handsome and witty staff; and, he can find management gurus and experts by the dozen, and one or two consultants and advisors.
But, he must be wise.
Yes, he must be wise enough to know in his mind and believe in his heart that no action of his, no amount of recruiting skills can hire, and no amount of money can buy character.
What I mean is,
- money cannot buy personal honesty and sincere beliefs and behaviors.
- Money can’t buy moral character (Ikhlas & Taqwa).
- For a leader to have a vision but not the proper character to show others the path toward it, well. . . it’s like a tree with decayed roots, both leafless and lifeless. It gives no benefit to itself or others.
And what I believe is missing from today’s business leaders’ decisions, policies and actions is the kind of character based on moral beliefs and behaviors.
This view/vision is based on life principles that influence character and guide the leader to always do what is morally right, even when all the world and everyone in it seem to be pressuring him to do what is morally wrong.
You know, this is the popular “take the easy way out,” “follow the wind,” and “go along with the majority of the group.”
In this cheating way of life and work you’ll probably have to lie a little here, and do some cheating there.
It’s the same cut-throat attitude of “business is business,” which has brought many leaders in today’s business world to their present moral degeneration. It’s sad and regrettable, but it is also very true.
On the other hand,
there’s another and BETTER WAY. Clearly,
a successful leader living a successful life, knows that he can’t hire, buy or
lease powerful principles of belief and behavior like trust, honesty,
fairness, kindness, respect and the courage to make the tough decisions and
consciously choose to do what is – and always has been – the right thing.
Character
& Leadership. p. 2
That is, before acting, the wise leader involves not only his head, but also his heart: to be a model for others, and to understand and act according ideas such as:
- Like the tree which takes decades to grow tall, but only minutes to cut down, TRUST takes years to build up, but only seconds to destroy.
- There is always room to improve, to change who you are into who you want to be.
- Although we can’t control what happens to us and outside of us, we CAN control what happens INSIDE of us before we react.
- To really understand that Taking Care of Business is really Taking Care of the People working in the Business.
- Knowing that kindness is not weakness; instead, it is wisdom, maturity and strength.
So, the effective and successful leader must realize that everyone likes to be acknowledged and appreciated. He gives time to people, shows patience, and always says the kind thing to guide others toward opportunities for improvement.
In conclusion, to be effective and successful, then, be a leader who consults both his head and heart. Base your actions on the everlasting principles of character I’ve been talking about, and you’ll be the one who -- knows the secrets -- and lives the secrets -- of Character & Leadership.
***
Written August 10/11, 2004 (REVISED Dec
2008) Dr. Daniel
MGT 210 students
Now read Handout # 2
Taking Care of Business . . .
HANDOUT # 2 (from a past radio show script)
TITLE: Taking care of business by taking care of people: The Heart & Soul of Leadership© 2003 Dr. Daniel (revised Dec 2008)
READING TIME: ~ 15 minutes
STYLE: Monologue
INTRO: [voice over] This is the [
] program in the series on
Business, Management & Leadership Communication They are especially focused on the issues and
needs of business people in the multi-cultural environment of Saudi Arabia and
the Gulf Region. However, many of these
programs will benefit not only business people, but also those who wish to
communicate more effectively in all aspects and roles of their lives – at home
or anywhere with family and friends.
Today,
our topic takes a slightly philosophical tone, but the path, as usual, is
straight toward practical advice that applies to your everyday job and life.
If
you believe that our future will be determined by the excellence of our
leaders, then they will be judged not only by how they took care of business. More importantly, their achievements will be
judged by how well they took care of THE PEOPLE working in the business.
That’s
why this program is called The Heart and Soul of Leadership.
And that’s why I developed what I call the Pathway
to Success. It includes 3 elements,
only three. They are: Head, Heart and
Hand – sometimes called Triple H.
That means Thinking, Feeling and Action in that
order, all holistically combined and synergized to tap into our powerful human
qualities.
First, Head. This is staying with the facts, doing proper
research, asking the right questions, thinking before acting, using your mind,
and gathering knowledge.
These are some of the qualities of Head.
The
Heart & Soul of Leadership – p 2
But
focusing attention only on this element alone is not enough. Just think about yourself as a person. Are you only logical? Do you only think and that’s it?
Of course not.
However,
thinking and knowledge without feeling and emotional understanding, is the path
to failure.
So,
we need the next step along the Pathway to Success which is Heart.
After
gathering information, thinking, and staying with the facts, start
using the powers of your Heart.
Listen for the feelings behind the facts when someone speaks with you; communicating
your own feelings at meetings and presentations, for example, really helps to
create strong and lasting relationships.
But,
just being emotional (Heart) without logical guides and rules (Head), without
positive physical action will be a disaster in business. Even when you are looking out for the
well-being of your employees, all three elements must be working together.
Otherwise,
you will lose your way. You will stray
off the Pathway to Success and end up on the Road of Failure and Regret.
That’s why you need the 3rd element – Hand.
Implementing the plan, following up on the new idea
and doing, checking and correcting . . . these are the qualities of Hand. This is putting the thinking, feeling and
learning into visible skills. It’s taking
action after Head and Heart.
go to p. 3
The Heart & Soul of
Leadership – p. 3
THE OTHER WAYS DO NOT
WORK
The faster, cheaper, shortcut way of
doing business and dealing with people just doesn’t work. In fact, this is one of the lessons being
learned around the world today in the biggest global companies. So many have realized that this way of thinking has not resulted
in a better future. It has brought NO
FUTURE really.
Question: What
are the results of forgetting that the Head, Heart and Hand MUST working together, that they complement one another?
Answer: Just
look at the news: CEOs and businessmen on trial, bankrupt corporations and
billions of dollars lost.
TRIPLE
H IS MORE THAN “WIN WIN”
In contrast, the kind of leadership
I’m describing is based on Truth, Caring, and Common Concern for the good of
everyone.
And this approach is more than the usual,
well-known “Win-Win” strategy.
Why?
Because, in the paradigm of Head, Hand and Heart,
there is no contest or game to WIN. There is no “Us” and “Them.” To be truly successful . .
.
there is only “We.”
Use Sharing,
Building, Communicating, and Satisfying.
For everyone involved.
You as the leader need to adopt the
following traits and attitudes if you wish to travel the Pathway to Success
that I’m talking about.
·
First,
the Pathway to Success Leader must be optimistic. Look for opportunities to improve, especially
when things don’t go quite right.
Learn from
the setbacks and mistakes, and teach the lessons to your employees.
The Heart & Soul of
Leadership – p. 4
·
Second,
get to know your people. Work with them,
even if it means “getting your hands dirty.”
Let me tell you a quick story to
illustrate. One of the biggest
leadership acts I even saw happened after the president of a large
multi-national company finished his luncheon speech, in the company’s
cafeteria. After most the employees had
gone, the cleaning crew started their work. This top executive noticed
something wasn’t quite right. He spoke
to one of the staff, and he began helping them clear away dirty dishes, because
several service personnel were out sick that day. That’s real teamwork. He cared more about
helping to get the job done, rather than worrying about his “face” in front of
the people. In fact, he increased his “face”
by helping out – but this kind of action will only work if the other people ALSO
HAVE THE RIGHT ATTITUDE ABOUT THEMSELVES, LIFE, and WORK.
·
Third,
to create the Right Attitude, you have to be both results and people
oriented. The Pathway to Success
leader communicates the vision and inspires his followers to reach goals and
achieve results. But, along the way, he
always remembers to encourage the people, to show that he believes in them and
recognizes their efforts and accomplishments.
In fact, he touches many important aspects of their lives well beyond
their work, salary and benefits.
Again,
understand me clearly. I don’t mean he’s
the great father figure. No. He builds up self-awareness, self-motivation,
and self-esteem of employees and sees more in them they sometimes they can see in
themselves.
·
Fourth,
they do what they say. In slang we
sometimes call it walking the talk.
They are role models. They
constantly ask themselves if they are doing the right things, AND if they are
doing them right.
·
Finally, the Pathway to
Success leaders live and act according to the
principle that what hurts one hurts all – So, they refuse to participate
in the “Us and Them” mentality where someone loses and someone wins. Where someone is up and someone is down.
Heart
and Soul of Leadership, p. 5
As
I noted earlier in the program, real success is in the “We “attitude. Sharing, Building, Communicating, and
Satisfying. For everyone involved. I believe this is so important for our
future. Because what happens 10 20 or 30
years from now will be defined by the kind of leadership we demonstrate NOW to
those who are following and will follow after us.
With
this in mind, let us start today in putting our Heads, Hearts and Hands
together and take the first steps along the Pathway to Success, so that our
coming generations will have a better and brighter future.
Thanks
for listening, and tune in again next week.
MGT
210 students:
NOW
READ:
Handout
# 3
The Islamic Way of TRIPLE H.
Written 2003
Dr. Daniel
Handout # 3
THE ISLAMIC WAY of TRIPLE H © 2003 Dr. Daniel
The Head, Heart and Hand approach to managerial communication and leadership is based on the Truth, Caring, and Common Concern for the good of everyone. An explanation is found in the hadeeth conveyed by Nu’man ibn Bashir who related that the Prophet said:
The Muslims in their mutual love, kindnes
are like the human body where when one of its parts
is in agony, the entire body
feels the pain both in sleeplessnes
(Bukhari
and Muslim)
This
approach is more demanding and more powerful than the ubiquitous “win-win”
negotiation and communication strategies promulgated by so many management
authors. In Head, Heart and Hand ( HHH), there is no contest or game to WIN. There is no “us” and “them,” or even two
sides. There is only WE – sharing,
building, communicating, satisfying. In the HHH approach, pleasing Allah
through intention
FIVE BEHAVIORS OF SUCCESS
You as the leader, the manager, or the supervisor can look for opportunities to adopt the traits of the Head, Heart and Hand approach to communication in everyday situations.
1. Look for opportunities to
improve, especially when things do not go quite right. Accept and integrate into your behavior the
valuable “lessons learned” from your own setback
Islamic Way of Triple H, p. 2
He repented, learned and corrected himself, and Allah gave him the judgment and wisdom of a prophet and messenger, all clearly stated in this verse of Quran:
Moses said: “I did it then, when I was
In error.
So I fled from you (all)
When I feared you; but my Lord has
(since)
Invested me with judgment (and wisdom)
And appointed
me as one of the messengers.”
Quran (Sura Shu’araa, 26,19-21)
2. Get to know your people. Work with them, even if it means getting your
hands dirty. The following gained will be the result of your leadership act of
Head, Hand, and Heart. For example, in
the
If we sat back while the Prophet
labored,
that would be our
most misguided action.
3. You have
to be both result
This does not mean acting out the paternalistic style of management. Quite the opposite approach is embraced as the HHH communicator builds up the self-awareness,
Islamic Way of Triple H, p. 3
self-motivation,
and self-esteem in employee
Studies of the early history of Islam and the events that shaped the Madinah community, show that in conjunction with Divine assistance the Prophet’s positive influence with his followers most likely arose from his leadership and communication style which always sought to uplift, respect and instruct.
An
analysis of this in Bashier’s study explains that “He
sought to exalt and improve his companion
4.
Another quality is doing what you say.
In slang it is called “walking the talk.” Being a role model is not easy; it i
enjoin what is
Just, and forbid what is wrong:
And bear with patient constancy
Whatever comes to you: for this
Is firmness (of purpose) in (the conduct
of) things
Quran (Sura Luqman, 31,17)
and i
O you who believe! Why do you say that
Which you do not do?
Quran (Sura al-Saff, 61,2)
To paraphrase a Stephen Covey statement on management and leadership, constantly ask yourself not only if you are taking action and doing it correctly; but, ask yourself if you are thinking about and working on the correct things in the first place.
Islamic Way of Triple H, p. 4
The image of behavior for Muslims,
mirrored in the intention
And truly, you (O Muhammad) are on
an exalted
standard of character
Quran (Sura Al-Qalam, 68,4)
As described in al-Mubarakpuri’s biography of the Prophet, “those were the
attribute
5.
Lastly, the HHH communicator live
In a company of three persons, two should not
hold confidential talk excluding the third. (Bukhari and Muslim)
[Riyadh-us-Saleheen, Vol. 2,
#1598, p.778]
The result of excluding one person
is very clearly prohibited in the Quran (Sura Al-Mujadila 58:10),
and is useful advice to follow in office dialog
The second, a general code of behavior reported by Anas who related that the Prophet said:
By the One in whose hand there stands my life, nobody (truly) believes
until he loves for his brothers what he loves for himself (Agreed.).
[Mishkat-ul-Masabih,
Vol. 1, #59, p. 292]
Islamic Way of Triple H, p. 5
CONCLUSION
To conclude this article, it is
emphasized that in today’s business environment and world of work, it is far too
easy to forget that in all we do, we must remain Muslim. That means submitting to the Will of Allah,
the teachings, advice, injunction
Particularly, communicating a
MGT 210 students Now read Handout # 4 THE HOUSE
This
is the Islamic Way of Triple H.
Handout # 4
THE HOUSE: HOW THE HEAD, HEART & HAND CAN HELP OR .
. . HURT YOU!
Success
and happiness are all in the way you think, feel and act. All the time, and every
time. That’s why TRIPLE H is the
guide.
According
to a famous story, there was an expert carpenter named Bob. He worked for Jim, a very successful civil
engineer for nearly 30 years. But one
day, Bob said that he wanted to retire.
Jim thanked Bob for all his outstanding work, and gave him
a $1,000 bonus. “What are you going to
do Bob when you retire?” Bob answered
that he wanted to find a piece of land and build a nice small house for himself
and his family.
Jim then asked Bob if he would help him build one last
house before he left and retired.
Bob was bitterly disappointed at
the small bonus of $1,000, but he saw the architect’s plans for a beautiful
house with a magnificent view and he wanted to build it as his last project.
Bob always prided himself on his very fine quality
workmanship and commitment to quality, but he was so angry and disappointed.
His heart was not in it.
So, in a kind of revenge, without thinking clearly,
he cheated on the cement for the foundation and put the extra money in his own
pocket.
He ignored details and his workmanship was poor. He thought
of it as a way to punish Jim for the small cash bonus. He just didn’t care.
When the house was finished Jim
paid Bob as usual for his carpentry work, and he gave him an envelope with a
thank-you card.
Bob was even more sad and upset -- until he look inside the
card and found the deed of ownership to the house he had just built! Jim gave Bob the house as a gift!
Bob was filled with shame. If he'd known he was building his own retirement
house – a gift from his boss Jim – and a place he would live in for the rest of
his life, he would have been so much more honest and attentive to detail.
go to p. 2
The House, p. 2
THE POINT? What we think, feel and do
is the house we live in. They’re our life and our character. Those are built from our daily actions and
choices.
- Tricks on others, not taking responsibility and
disrespect for rules and truth will make us end up like the poor
carpenter, Bob. We will be hurting
ourselves.
- Whenever we take shortcuts to get us through the
days, we are really CHEATING OURSELVES.
- Whenever we put in less than our best, we create
a future full of creaky floors, leaky roofs and crumbling foundations.
MGT 210 students Now read Handout #5 Being and Staying Positive
TRIPLE H reminds
us, coaches us, and guides us to the highest quality of life and work. Put it into action in your daily life to “build”
yourself a palace of best thoughts and actions for today and tomorrow. You’ll be glad you did. Now and in the future.
HANDOUT # 5
TITLE: Benefits of Being and
Staying Positive
READING TIME: ~ 5 minutes
When we think of a leader that we admire, or a friend who has an outlook on life that makes him kind of special, the usual reason is his positive attitude about everything that he does and everything that happens to him. In the Quran remember the verse [After Hardship, Comes Relief, After Hardship, Comes Relief – Chapter # 94, Verses 5-6].
In our own work at in our lives there are times when a positive attitude would go a long way in making things seem a little better, a little brighter and easier to take. But how can we do it when frustration, anger or sadness are drowning us in their negative powers?
Well, it’s not easy to be positive all the time. We have to set proper goals and we have to work hard to achieve them. It takes practice and the right outlook on life. But, to get started on the road to a positive attitude and to stay on it, let’s look at a few tips that you can begin using today, right now.
INFLUENCE OTHERS – When you are positive, people around you are positively influenced.
GAIN INTEREST IN YOUR IDEAS – A positive attitude changes the impression other people get of you. If you were ignored before, your positive attitude can make you more welcomed and liked.
STRENGTHEN LEADERSHIP – A leader (at work, home, anywhere) with a positive attitude keeps followers following longer and more loyally.
FULFILL GOALS – People can reach their potential more
easily when you have a positive attitude about them. They will also help YOU to achieve and reach your
goals.
MOTIVATE OTHERS – Your positive attitude motivates others by releasing their creative energy and making them want to improve.
INSTILL CONFIDENCE – The positive energy you show gives others more confidence in themselves, in their work, and in YOU.
MGT 210 Students: Now read Handout # 6 Dealing with our Problems.
HANDOUT # 6
Dealing Positively
and Successfully With Problems
We Can All Learn Something
Important from a Carrot, Egg & Coffee Beans
(a follow up to “Being and Staying Positive”)
Yes, a carrot, an egg and coffee
beans. All of them are affected by the extreme difficulty of being boiled. It seems negative to be boiled. But . . . the results can also be beneficial
and different. The same is for us as
people, if we pay attention to the Lessons of a Carrot, an Egg & Coffee
Beans.
First the
carrot.
When
the carrot stays in boiling water, several different results can happen.
But
will you let the boiling water (meaning your problems, frustrations, difficulties)
affect you negatively or positively? For
example,
Ø
a carrot in boiling
water can become too soft and mushy if it stays in the water too long.
Ø
Not
enough time, and the carrot stays hard and difficult to chew.
Ø
But,
just the right time and the carrot is very useful,
very tasty – a real benefit.
Well,
if we are negative, then we can become so careless, weak and lifeless when we
face our problems. Or, we can be
positive about our situation and emerge more flexible, understanding, compassionate
and grateful for the chance to learn and show our patience.
Really
it’s your choice – negative or positive.
And the
lesson in the egg?
Problems and
disappointments/frustrations can be like the boiling water. You, the egg, can become over cooked and too
hard. That is, you can become more
distrusting and suspicious of others, pessimistic, not sensitive and
unavailable to others. This is negative.
Or, you can choose the positive
benefits of troubles and problems by becoming better, stronger, tougher and
wiser – learning lessons from mistakes, for example. The “boiling water” of
successfully solving problems has turned you into something useful to others;
something more valuable than before. You
have learned and can teach others from your own personal experience.
Problems, p. 2
And the coffee beans?
Like
the coffee beans, we can become lost in the “hot water.” The flavor and soul of the beans completely
lost in the brown liquid. Meaning that
your internal spirit, your personality, your energy is lost. You let the problem “drown” YOU. That’s
negative.
Instead,
be positive.
Ø
Remember
that the beans are an essential ingredient and the power of those beans (the
oils, the taste, the acid) are really what make the boiling water become
something valuable when the beans are ground and are mixed with it.
Ø
It’s the
same for you.
Ø
Your
personality, your intelligence mixes with the problem, you think of a solution,
you move forward – learning, growing.
Ø
You
leave the problem behind as a positive lesson to learn from, not something
negative sitting on your head all the time and forever.
MEANING – Either we can lose ourselves completely in negative
thoughts and behaviors. Or, we can
choose to learn from dealing with a problem. So, professionally transform your
lives into something better, by using the following tips:
TIPS TO IMPROVE:
1st. The first step to turn problems into
pleasures is to get out of the “hot water” as quickly as possible. Don’t
dwell on the problem. Concentrate on the
solution.
EXAMPLES:
Ø
If you
failed at something important to you, search for the reason and fix it.
Remember the wrong way and the right way for next time. Then, when the next time comes, you’ll be
successful at the same thing.
Ø
If
someone died or is sick in your family.
Grieve, feel sorry for them and you, but move on. Don’t define your life
by misfortune. Keep the happy, fun
memories of that person with you instead.
This is also advice for other people you know who have the same problem.
Ø
If you
missed a deadline, analyze the root cause for being late. Promise yourself that in the future you’ll
finish even sooner than the deadline.
Plan, Prepare and Deliver for success.
Problems, p. 3
2nd “Learn and Leave it.” Force yourself to take a lesson from the
mistake or problem, then leave it behind. You will have valuable experience this
way. If you let the problem “drown you”
then you lost a chance to improve and grow.
A very wise man once said, “The
problem is not the problem; it’s the way you THINK about the problem that’s the
REAL problem.
Ø
Think of
your problem as a chance to learn.
Ø
Think
about your problem as a chance to show others how you can overcome difficulties.
Ø
Think
about your problem as a challenge that will make you wiser, better, smarter and
more valuable to you and to your family, and to the world (no joke).
3rd Draw on inner strengths, the people
who love you, and your faith. These
will help you transform your life into something better. Formulate a vision for
a more purposeful life filled with people and experiences that will help you
become more fulfilled.
HOW? By thinking, feeling and
doing TRIPLE H, of course.
Finally,
remember this famous phrase and agree upon it :
I’M GETTING
BETTER & BETTER
EVERY DAY, IN
EVERY WAY,
So I’ll go and do it, not tomorrow, but
today.
This is the Last Handout. Read, Remember, Think, Feel
& Do. InshaAllah there
will great success for me and YOU!