ClassiC DefinitionS & CooL MeaningS
1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
4. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
5. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
6. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
7. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ..
8. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
9. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
10. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
11. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
12. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
13. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
14. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
15. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
16. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
17. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
18. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
19. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
20. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
21. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
22. Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
23. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
24. Father : A banker provided by nature.
25. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
26. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
27. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
28. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
29. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails......!